KAYLA RYAN WALSH
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3/2/2021

Performing Noises Off with a live audience

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​This is my favorite.
The quiet before the storm.
Or the quiet AFTER the storm.
The feeling something magical is about to happen.
Or JUST happened...
What occurred here was nothing short of miraculous, unexpected, exhausting, stressful, and thrilling.
I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t re-learning to walk before I could run again.
There were large portions of this contract where I felt I wasn’t my true self, and it wasn’t until the very end I felt like I had returned again.
The authentic version of myself I mean.
My depression, guilt, and need to be liked ebbed and flowed, and there were times I could feel myself trying too hard, or not hard enough.
I offer this bit of transparency because it’s easy for social media to mask true happenings, and just because I was fortunate enough to have a creative opportunity during a time in which NO creatives are working, in no way means it was perfect. The idea of perfection itself is farcical.
A gentle reminder.
To anyone reading this, and also my future self.
The biggest surprise (and delight) was realizing that theatre didn’t lose its luster, even after all this time away. It’s still as thrilling as it ever was, if anything, more so, and tackling this BUCKET LIST of ALL bucket list shows was a lovely reminder why I love this field to an indescribable degree. And I’ll always look back on this experience and remember that.
Each person who had a hand in making this dream a reality was instrumental: backstage, onstage, and beyond the wings.
So fortunate to return to my theatre home away from home (amongst some of the kindest individuals I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with)
I hope those who followed us along on this journey saw this as a beacon of HOPE - hope that theatre will be back, better than ever.
And I’m a firm believer it will be.
I don’t know the next time I’ll have the opportunity to perform in front of a live audience, but I do know I won’t take it for granted ever again.
Till next time, Pops.
I hope you got your version of a happy ending...
...I sure did <3

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    Actress

    New York, NY

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